See this image? Well, I’m not gonna say this happened to me on Saturday. Because it didn’t. I never had a Lotus wedged under my car.

It was a Holden Barina.

Fortunately for me, the Barina is a small car. So small, that as the car behind it smashed into its bumper, it was gracefully sent sliding beneath my car.

Okay, I may be exaggerating the graceful bit. It slammed into me with an almighty thud and crumple. (Yeah, you’ve heard that noise. You’ve felt that bump. You know what it’s like when your heart both sinks and goes into overdrive at the same time.) It was only when my hands and legs stopped shaking long enough for me to get out of the car, and help a shocked Mr 7 from the back, that I realised I’d been involved in a four car pile up. A ute (SUV) had neglected to break for a traffic light, and slammed into the car in front of it, which in turn slammed into the Barina, which in turn visited the underbelly of my car.

Things got real exciting after that initial thud. Within minutes traffic was backed up for kilometers, and the place was overrun by police cars, ambulances and firetrucks. Firefighters were in the road, pouring sand over leaking oil and brake fluid. Police officers were taking statements from all the drivers and passengers (even Mr 7 made a statement) and ambos were walking up and down seeing if anyone was hurt or required hospitalization.

I was lucky. And nope, I’m not saying that with even the slightest note of sarcasm. I really was lucky. Both Mr 7 and I escaped without a scratch, and I was able to drive the car home afterwards. (Although it’s headed off to the insurance agents to be looked over now.) The other three cars weren’t so lucky. Every one of them was towed away – 3 smashed up messes. And it seemed, apart from shock, only one person was injured, and she suffered whip lash.

Mr 7 stood there with eyes agog the entire time. Me, well, my hands are still a little shaky just thinking about it five days later. (Writing down the details of the other drivers for insurance purposes was close to impossible. You should see what my hand writing looked like.)

What can I say? It’s been an…interesting month. Broken legs, operations, DVTs, injections and now an accident.

I’d like to say things can’t get any worse. But I already said that. And then a car drove into mine. So I’ll just quietly take a deep breath and hope everything settles down soon. In the mean time, anyone have a stiff drink for me? Or some valium maybe?